YOU: “I don’t like how you’re leading this workshop. I quit. (And I know it’s non-refundable, but can I have my money back?)”

ME: “You may not like me, and you may find my leadership style irritating. I seem bossy and maybe you don’t like how I arrange the chairs or the tone of my voice. (Sometimes that’s just your unconscious sexism, sometimes I’m just annoying.)

But often, we externalize our resistance to the work. Of course I do annoying things, and I’m an imperfect leader, and I’ll apologize if I’ve done something wrong. (And sometimes when I haven’t. That’s just my unconscious sexism.) But if the way I arrange the chairs makes you want to quit, it’s probably most productive for your creative expression to STAY in class, keep showing up, (and annoy me), examine what’s driving you crazy, and tell a story about THAT.” (People who keep showing up, and examine their authority issues, have amazing final performances, and they’re so glad they did pushed through.)

(Another version of this is finding fellow classmates annoying or offensive or difficult. Of course they are! But what’s it bringing up in you that you’re letting them get in the way of your creative success? Can you prioritize your creative life over your difficulties with others?)

Alicia Dattner

Comedian and Creatrix Alicia Dattner is an internationally-acclaimed, award-winning performer who loves to help others use the power of humor to transform their lives and write a new unfolding story for the world.


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