Creative Heart Coaching

What's Your Birthday Do for You?

Mine makes me reflect.

Guess what? Today, I turn the ripe old age of 34! I was just starting to get the hang of 33. "The Jesus year."  

Now, it might be hard to believe... but I wasn't always the comedy rock goddess you see before you today. It's hard to admit that some things have been tough for me - except when I'm on stage... then I apparently love to admit it. But we all want to look good, myself included, and to be respected and to make a good impression. But by doing so, we essentially lie. And my job as a comedian has always been to tell the truth. So here it is.

Yes, I've spent a over decade performing comedy, but it was largely unpaid and for give minutes at a time. It was easy to sleep in until 10am every day. Working day jobs that I didn't really feel passionate about. Since I was little, I had always felt like there was something different, something wrong with me, some way I didn't fit in.

I struggled for many years with an eating disorder, with a love and relationship addiction. It was easier to fall in love with men who had some quality that I wanted to possess, rather than actually developing my own self. Continually disappointed that true love was not forthcoming, I'd eat myself into a fog. And it's hard to pursue your life's purpose and make a real living when you're suffering from a love hangover and a food coma. The emotional vicissitudes were so intense--nothing felt stable or lasting or fulfilling, and I never really managed to create the kind of sustainability or impact or sheer good quality work I longed for, and was afraid I could never have. 

Seven years ago, I hit bottom. Not human bottoms. Ok, I did hit human bottoms. But I also hit low points. And I went into recovery for these various addictions. I've now done volumes of spiritual and growth work, from learning swing dance to doing a series of shamanic medicine journeys, to 12-step recovery programs.

And the most amazing thing happened four years ago. I became ready to cut the crap, and get serious about my comedy career. But this time, I had to walk my own path. And I had to let go of all my ideas and concepts about what "real comedians" do... real comedians perform at dark and drunken comedy clubs where you can literally smell the bitterness and competition... "real comedians" aren't spiritual. "Real comedians" eat ramen and live with 6 roommates. Well, my path, it turned out, was to take what I had learned through 10 years of standup and years of acting classes, and start telling the stories of my life in my own way, injecting humor into the pain and healing with laughter. And, often, inspiring others to take themselves less seriously. 

Last Wednesday, I put on my show "Eat, Pray, Laugh!" at my friend Jim's house. It was one of the best shows I've ever done… and one of the most fun. At the end, they brought out a cake and sang happy birthday. What a gift. That night, I realized: I have worked my ass off to to find my own comedic voice, one that is truer to my spirit than ever. Wow, it's okay to be funny AND earnest AND vulnerable! And I found my true audience--not in comedy clubs, but in alternative venues, theaters, yoga studios, and the houses of friends. God, it feels good to speak the truth and make people laugh like this. It's taken over 20 years to figure out how to embody this kind of truth and humor on stage, but it was worth working for.

 And it's amazing to have it pay off. This past Saturday, I played my highest paying gig ever at the Iowa City Yoga Festival, plus all those expenses paid (!! - flight, hotel, etc.) and they brought my boyfriend out to teach a workshop as well. That, and winning awards like "Best Local Comedian", "Best of the Fringe" and "Best Storyteller" confirms that I actually have found my path, and I'm walking it. But what's most exciting is that I know that, even with all the years I've spent working at it, it's just the beginning.

I recently met Julia Butterfly Hill, who has a totally amazing life story and a powerful impact on the world, and she confirmed for me something I'd been thinking. That we don't have to stop being who we are. Those of us who are different, who don't fit in, we are gifted. We are can be sensitive, intense, frustrated, angry, sad, and we sometimes overflow with passion and desire. And we don't have to change who we are--we just have to learn how to focus our energy in the right place. 

This has become a passion of mine to now share with others. I've developed a new coaching technique that allows you to accurately tap into your higher self, your soul’s deepest source of wisdom. and show you how to integrate it into your life - powerfully, compassionately, & effortlessly. I'm currently calling it Higher Self Coaching - which is designed for people who are tired of going to others for answers, and who just want to be able to access the real answers they know are locked somewhere deep inside, and move forward with clarity certainty. Some of my specialties include life purpose, relationships, and recovery. 

 If you're interested learning how to focus your energy in the right place, to find your own path, your own voice, your own gifts, let's chat - we'll set up a "Get Your Own Answers! Session." Email me, or you can schedule a time online here. 

Finally... I have several projects in the works that I'm excited to share with you soon. For now, enjoy a little feel-good music, on the house. This is a song I recorded, and it's dedicated to you. 

No matter how well we do or don't know each other, you've been an important part of my path. Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I look forward to walking on the road of life with you. 

And if you're ready to make a powerful shift in your life and feel called to work with me, you can book a consultation here:

Sending blessings for a year filled with laughter and light!

Alicia

How to be a Really Funny Comedian, Part 8: Professionalism

You may have seen fastcompany.com's 2011 output of the 100 Most Creative People in Business back in May. That ridiculous photo of the many Conan's sure caught my attention. Though Conan O'Brien came in 8th place, the focus on his creative process is worth reiterating. Plus, he wrote a guide to creativity. Who doesn't like guides?

The man is a true professional who rides on the success of effective preparation. But key to his real success is the pressure-induced, improv decision-making that follows his good prep. "Prepare like crazy," says Conan. "But then just as you're heading out, half an hour beforehand, forget all of it. It's in your reptile brain. Go out but feel loose enough to grab opportunities as they come up."

Conan draws analogies between horse-racing, diamond-formation, cooking and surfing to the business of creative comedy. Somehow these topics have a few things in common: they are greatly impacted by the chance occurrence of the perfect elements, the presence of a ton of pressure, and the flexibility to go off course should the opportunity arise. Conan puts a lot of weight in the fun factor and maintaining a loose work environment to allow full freedom for mistakes and mishaps that may turn into the next best idea.

Also, knowing what he can and cannot control has allowed Conan to tap further into his improvisation. His job is to set the tone, not to micro-manage his writers. Therefore, his tone is light and he considers the best and the worst to be on equally footing for funny material. The best material from Conan happens when he draws outside of the lines and the audience can tell that something organic is happening. Conan tells his colleagues that "the only way we can screw up is by not being bold enough." 

So what can we learn from Mr. O'Brien's guide about creativity in the business of comedy? 

1. "Creating a show is like playing the horses... No, wait-it's really like the making of a jewel." (i.e. The build up of pressure fosters a great production).

2. "Prepare like crazy so you can wing it." (i.e. Trust your 'reptile brain').

3. "Improvising is like surfing." (i.e. Be open to the whim of the current and ride out the opportunity to improvise).

4. "Creativity should be fun. Seriously." (i.e. Seriously fun).

5. " Fostering a collective comic sensibility is like cooking." (i.e. Get a rough idea, but don't overcook things with intense rehearsals because you need room to seize the moment for improv). 

6. Learn from other creative CEO's, and pep-talk your staff (i.e. Only try to control what you actually can, and create an environment where people are encouraged to be bold). 

Do you want to step up your standup career? If you're read to make a powerful shift in your life and feel called to work with me, you can book a free consultation here:

How to be a Really Funny Comedian, Part 7: Do Your Homework

There are lots of ways to study comedy. How you do it is up to you, but that you do it shouldn't be a question. The most embarrasing thing you could do would be to plagarize a joke (or think you were the first to come up with it) at your first big club gig and as you walk off stage, have someone point out that your three minute dentist bit was already done by Bill Cosby 30 years ago. That's why you gotta study comedy.

Another important part of studying comedy is studying "voice." But what's that mean, right? 

Take Steven Wright's "voice." You might say, "Well, there's a guy who's kinda depressed, and his humor comes out of being sad." Another way to view his voice would involve examining the mechanism of humor that he's using. For example, Wright uses absurdity as his main mode of humor. He is one of the greatest joke writers of all time, and his humor was continually surprising and clever and genius. It's the kind of humor that inspired me to become a comedian. I once wrote a joke about freeze-dried water, and I was telling it to a fellow comedian who said, oh, like that Steven Wright joke about dehydrated water? Good thing I didn't tell it on stage! I like to think that when that happens, it means we're on the right track. And that perhaps I have some similarities with his sense of humor. When I was younger, I was more interested in absurd humor then I am today, but I still appreciate it deeply. 

ACTION: Go to your parents' house and dust off their record player and their old comedy albums. Make sure that you are aquainted with the old comedy as well as the new and that you really have an idea of who wrote what classic bits: Richard Pryor, Robin Williams, Eddie Murphy, etc. 

STAY TUNED: more tantalizing comedy secrets tomorrow! Also check out these series of How To's:

How to be a Comedian Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six and Seven

So You Want to Write a One Person Show Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six and Seven

If you're ready to step up your standup career, and feel called to work with me, you can book a free consultation here:

Alicia

How to be a Really Funny Comedian, Part 6: Culture Jamming

Continuing again from the last two posts on audience and culture, I have been discussing performing my show about traveling in India in other countries and for other audiences than my target demographic. Those who have not traveled, or who have no interest in spirituality/spiritual seeking find the shadow to be mildly amusing rather than laugh-out-loud-roll on the floor-hold-your-belly-because-your cheeks-are-hurting kind of funny. Women tend to enjoy it more than men. Older people sometimes more than younger ones. I also have performed the show in different countries. When I arrived to put it on in England, I realized there were a huge amount of references that I had no idea would be so so difficult to translate until I was on stage, telling the story. 

So not only are there differences in audiences' senses of humor with time, culture, and language, there are also differences in values and perspective. Audiences want to relate to the person on stage. And they want to be challenged at the same time. For example, people who go to see Dennis Miller are generally wanting to hear someone who is angry about things and politically conservative. People who watch Jon Stewart are generally wanting to hear the truth. Of course I'm not biased.

ACTION: Go out and do a set in a totally different venue with a totally different audience than you normally do. Figure out how to adjust your set for their sensibilities without compromising what you have to say.  Is it possible?

STAY TUNED: more tantalizing comedy secrets tomorrow! Also check out these series of How To's:

How to be a Comedian Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six and Seven

So You Want to Write a One Person Show Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six and Seven 

If you're ready to step up your standup career, and feel called to work with me, you can book a free consultation here:

Alicia